Dr. Sol Gordon, 85, of Chapel Hill, Professor Emeritus of Syracuse University, with a distinguished career as a clinical psychologist, educator, and recipient of many scholarly awards, died on December 2, 2008. Dr Gordon wrote over one hundred articles for professional publications and authored 30 books, including a controversial series of comic books on sex education written for teens who resisted reading. A widely respected figure in sex education, he started the popular undergraduate course in human sexuality at Syracuse University, attracting up to 400 students a semester. The course grew into the Summer Institute for the Study of Human Sexuality.
Dr. Gordon said, “My most valuable contribution to the field of sexuality education is having created the concept ‘Are You an Askable Parent?’ If a child asks a question about sex, the only appropriate response for a parent is — ‘that is a good question,’ and then proceed to answer it. Parents are the main sex educators of their children, whether they like it or not. If they want to be ‘askable,’ they must be prepared for any question or incident that involves their children’s sexuality. Parents must convey to their children that nothing that ever happens to them will be made worse by talking about it to the parents, and the best first response is — ‘I’m so glad you are able to talk to me about this.’”
I remember the first time I heard Dr. Gordon speak. It was maybe 30 years ago. I was pretty new to the reproductive health/sexuality field, and what I remember is laughing until I had tears in my eyes, and wanting to hold onto everything he said. I saw him just a year or so ago – maybe at an AASECT meeting? – and got up the nerve to approach him, to say hello, to mention the name of a mutual colleague whom I thought he would remember. He greeted me so warmly, in a way that was so genuine, and with that sparkle of curiosity that was always such a part of his presence. In a way that I think he would deem most important, we have not lost him: he gave himself, his wisdom, humor and insight, to all of us involved in this work, and to all of those we touch. Oh how lucky we are!
